So tomorrow my homosexual lover and I will drive to Nevada, to spend the holiday with my two homosexual fathers in their tastefully appointed home in the Carson Valley. I anticipate that there will be several other dinner guests in attendance, all of them Known Homosexuals. Over plates of turkey and cranberry sauce we will, as we do every year, conspire on our most recent additions to the Agenda. This year I will put forth a motion to pursue legalized marriage between men and farm animals, which I anticipate will receive a unanimous vote of support from my peers. After dinner and a light dessert, we will play board games and hope for a knock on the door from some Mormon boys. Failing that, we will disperse in various cars to roam the neighborhood for potential recruits. May you and yours have an equally fulfilling holiday!
True Stories with Teeth